Eternal Refuge FIRST HUG OF OUR LORD, sometime around 1958


Sometime, around 1958
In Spain, in a little town of Chipiona (Cadiz) one early Sunday morning, my dear earthly mother took me to the church for the very first time. I don't recall many things when I was that little, but this first visit to the House of God, I can still feel like I'm living at that moment. It happened that we where in a hurry holding hands, flying by through the west side door of the church. The first thing that I saw, was a life size statue of a man sitting on a rock. He was wearing a crown with thorns and bleeding all over, His body was full of scars, and His mouth open Like He was hardly breathing. A reed laid across his left arm and legs. I felt so much piety for the defenseless man, and I could not comprehend how someone could be so deadly hurt. Feeling very overwhelmed with tears on my eyes, I ask my Mammy, " Who was that man ? She replied, "Jesus! I asked my second question " Who hurt him so bad ? Her reply was quick, " our sins! That keep me quiet for a while. I could not to figure out, how and when, we did that to Him. Very quick, we reached a pew, where my mamma knelt, and started to pray. Some people where sitting, others thinking, reading, talking. I went to take another look at Jesus' crown with thorns. I returned to my mamma, and without any indication from anybody, everybody including my mamma, stood up quickly, and started to make the sign of the cross. I was wondering who told them to do everything the same and at the same time, When the priest spoke, everybody answered something, and all at the same time.
I went again to look at the suffering Jesus. He was so real to me, that I thought that He was hardly breathing. When I went back to my mamma again, this time everybody was very quiet and on their knees. My mammy had her hands in a praying position, touching her lips and nose, but she had tears running down her chick, that brought me the same feeling of piety, that I feel for Jesus. With tears again in my eyes, I asked my mammy, " Why are you crying ?" She embraced me with her right arm. With her lips on my left ear she whispered softly, "Joaquin! This is the Consecration. When the Priest lifts the bread on High, and you hear the bells ring, that bread is no longer bread. Instead it is Our Lord Jesus. We must say like Saint Thomas did when He saw Our Lord,
' My Lord!.... and My God!"
At that precise moment we heard the bells ring. I felt goose bumps all over my body. Somehow, I new that Jesus was embracing me and telling me...

" I love you!"

So I answered Him back.. " My Lord!... and My God!" That was how I felt the ...


Since then, every time I go to Mass, and whenever I feel goose bumps, I answer Our Lord,

" My Lord!... and My God!,....I love You too!!!!
With this answer, I always know that I'm answering Our Lord on every hug that He Is granting me!!

Around September or October of the same year, I was playing cowboys and Indians with a few friends. We started a real fire from many withered branches of six tall vines from the porch of our home. We danced around the fire like the Indians did prior to war. We started running toward the huge smoke and jumped trough it. When it was my turn to jump, I ran towards the fire like everybody else, but I stumbled on a wire fence half buried in the ground, I fell directly on the center of the huge fire, and quickly stood up putting my right lower arm, hand, and right knee, on the burning charcoal. Instantly, the cloth started burning, melting with my flesh. This is the only time that I remember that I run so fast, that no one could catch me for a while. Thanks God my friends finally reached me because the more that I ran, the stronger was the flame. They took me to the well of our house and threw a few buckets of water over me until the fire was out, but I felt like I was in Hell. The cleanup of the melted cloth with my flesh, was very, very painful! Finally after two hours, when the Doctor finished with all His work, they put me to rest on my bed, I could not resist the pain. The words of courage from my family did not alleviate me at all, and I felt so much despair. I turned by the Grace of God, ( and not because I though about it ), to Our Lord Jesus. I remember that in my despair, crying, and barely breathing, because my heart was in shock, in my mind I said to Him:
Please!!! Please!!! dear Jesus, let me die now, I can't suffer any more!!! Please take me with You, Please Do!!!
Instantly I felt Peace. Strange and without my understanding I felt a stronger heat that was refreshing to me, wiping away all pain. I thanked Our God for taking me to Heaven........, but when I wake up, I was not in Heaven, but I was still on my bed.........Yes Our Lord did not do, as I asked Him, to let me die,...... but He took instantly all my pain out!!!! That was:

Today (40 years after that accident) I still have the scar on my right elbow around 5" by 2" and on my right knee 5" a round scar. Every time that I see the scars, I thank God for His Mercy and for rescue me out of Hell..... or trouble. Believe me:
I felt I was in Hell at that time!!!
But I understand that there is no comparison about the fires of down hear on earth and the fires in Hell............... Lord have Mercy of me, for I'm a poor sinner!!!